Magazines
A side-effect of a change of career is the realisation that there are literally 1000’s of magazines that I’d never heard of before. Last week, for example, we received a glossy copy of “Concrete Cutter”. I was astonished to discover that the “Journal of the drilling and sawing association” had managed to fill a whole 23 pages on the subject of concrete and the many wonderful ways of cutting it. Mind you, they had cheated by filling 3 pages with a “Focus on Concrete Crushing”.
I’m still not quite sure why they’d feel that, as plumbers, we would ever want to cut concrete, but if we ever have the urge we now know where to go; we might even opt to go all modern and crush it.
A more applicable magazine to ourselves is the unambiguously named ‘The Professional Heating & Plumbing Installer’. Not only is this magazine filled with handy tips and useful articles, it is also remarkably well written and surprisingly humorous. Below is the February issues editorial:
As we’re all well aware, all plumbers are a bunch of tea swilling, customer-conning, clapped-out-van-driving, corner-cutting, cash raking charlatans. We know this because the media told us so and the media don’t lie. Observing the habits of plumbers isn’t sociology, it’s primatology in its rawest form. Oh, and one last thing. They don’t have a sense of irony either, do they?
In any walk of life, there are those who are diligent, industrious and dedicated, and there are those who will do the bare minimum to get by. There are those with an unhealthy obsession with football and those who wouldn’t know their Bernt Hass from their elbow, those who love opera and those who think Puccini is a type of pasta.
We are not defined by the career path we choose, we are defined by our Environment, upbringing and beliefs. You want proof? We got it, in the form of the results of a survey of around 5,000 customers carried out by a merchant chain.
At the risk of making granny take an evening class in egg sucking, the following facts have been revealed about Britain’s plumbing fraternity:
Less than one third (29%) name a tabloid (Sun/Mirror) as their preferred newspaper, with a much higher proportion (42%) reading a mid-range paper (Mail/Express). Broadsheets are popular with 20% of plumbers.
Over a quarter (26%) list film and music as their number one hobby - almost as many as those who prefer football (27%). Close to a tenth (9%) play Golf. ‘Classic FM’ is the favourite radio station of around 21% of plumbers. 81% are on-Line.
Applying a minor amount of spin to these findings (after all, it’s not as if they’re government statistics), it is therefore feasible that as many as a fifth of plumbers read a ‘high-brow’ newspaper, listen to classical music and surf for information on avant-garde French cinema. Equally, it is possible that 79% like Britney Spears, 19% are unable to use a mouse and 9% can’t even read.
All of which merely serves to prove that plumbers are as diverse a breed as any other, and that it’s not too tough to manipulate figures to suit your angle. Keep an eye out for the illiterate plumbers headline in the near future. You might have to get a friend to read it to you though.
Brilliant stuff!
